A dilemma.

A friend of mine approached me for a part-time 'business' which I'm rather uncertain of. The venture seems more like a MLM company which isn't my cup of tea. Stuck between rejecting the offer and doing my friend a favour, I decided to meet him tomorrow for a discussion. Isn't that how MLM companies work ? Psycho friends and exploit friendships to earn cash ? If it's MLM or another disguised MLM, forget it. I'd rather earn through honest and moral efforts, not through pressurising acts and scams. How I wish the previous business plan could take off. Alas, bo lui leh.

Early in the afternoon, I visited the neighbouring music shop and found a song book with all time favourite songs' tabs. Songs like those from Kevin Kern and enchanting Korean drama theme songs really wanna make you buy it and strut it out for self-entertainment and pleasure. That diverted my attention a lil' from the MLM thingy, I really it's a no-strings attached discussion, otherwise I have to call for backup to pave my escape route.

Here's a review of a book I recently bought at NUH (yes.)

Book Title : Hidden Fears
Author : Dr Ko Soo Meng, Assoc. Prof. and Consultant Psychiatrist with the Department of Psychological Medicine, NUH.

I'm sure each one of you out there have obsessions and compulsive rituals, but when these get too intense and frequent or when they affect us socially and at work, possibly it's an obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Can you imagine someone showering for 4 hours and finishing a cake of soap for each shower ? Absurd but it is true. This book shows the causes of such problems and how to recognise it and deal with it. It also sheds light on some rumours/myths pertaining to such radical behaviours. In addition, discussions about phobias and the wide variety of phobias are enlightening. Lastly, treatment and self-help for OCD and phobic sufferers with a table for self-checking.

Jigsaw pieces to a bigger picture.

Once in a while, some seemingly true qoutes about Life appear in my mind, I wonder what will it be like if I piece these qoutes and ideas together.

Things like " The sense of touch, sight, hearing, smell and taste are manipulating. ", " Fame is addictive. ", " Lusting is a progressive vicious cycle. ", " It's intrinsic for Man to dominate others. ".

How NS has shaped my perception of certain words.

Posting doesn't mean blog entries, forum entries but human entries into camps/bases.
Parade ain't fun.
Party neither.
Turn out's a bad word.
Double means run, nothing mathematical.
F--- is simply harmless verbal entertainment.
Admin means relac one corner !
Dekit is a great joy.
Last parade is an oasis.

Commercial Euphemism; Utilitarian perception.

I recalled that a few months before enlistment, I bought papers everyday to have a quick browse at what jobs I could take up. I came across one which was enticing. " Tuition Coordinator $10/hr ", picked up the phone and gave the fella a call. The fella spoke with deep tone and sounded mechanical, I was impressed with his quick reflexes in answering questions. I missed the interview and happened to speak to my friend about it.
Apparently, the job ad was tricky.
My friend wanted to try the job many years back and discovered its stinky secret. You don't coordinate other people's tuition but you do your own and it sounded like ultimate sai kang. You print your own ads, you dial your own client's no., you find business yourself and I seriously wonder how $10/hr can be generated. He tried it out when we were Sec 4 and obviously explains why the phone operator sounded so dead and computerised. Saw another ad today, " Course Coordinator .. Earn $2000/month .. Earn as you learn !... for only.. ", don't bother reading again, it never made sense to me.
Euphemism has been used as a tool to get labour fast and labour depressed. With greater transparency, ads could hopely reduce the pain of being tricked especially when one is utterly down in luck with job searching. Of course, what can people do if employers say that typographical space on the papers are precious and costly thus condensing job descriptions.

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I was waiting for my turn at NUH Diagnostics Imaging Centre and grabbed the papers and read the Forum. It was about abortion and all those things you typically encounter during GP class but nonetheless I read on. Refreshing and revelating it was, the writer hit on the right spot. Away with all these " I can't support a disabled child thus I'm going to abort it " bullshit, she (if I'm right) described some of the people as utilitarian. Forget about philosophical enquiries in moral issues, most of us are just obsessed with pragmatism and self-fulfilment. No one wishes to die, even some people who are going to jump down hestitate, the 'Silent Scream' very well justifies that foetuses don't want to die. Dreams, ideals are also things that disabled people have. Come to think of the phrase ' Disabled people ', we too are flight-disabled (as she wrote), just that all can't fly thus => normal. It's sad that I still can't break out of the utilitarian mindset, I believe I'll have great difficulty because I've been brought up in a practical and fast-paced environment. I've been too dominating such that I feel that it's something intrinsic of me. Perhaps that's why I and maybe we have difficulty accepting others who are different and less able than us.

The revival of an old interest.

It's probably been eons since I tried to write a decent blog. I subconsciously sworn/vowed to depart from the ludicrous activity called blogging. After reading Karen's blog (Dan & HT's friend), I felt I should probably treat this place as a private thought dumping ground, a platform to showcase random nonsense that assembled in my mind during NS training.

Recently I felt utterly relieved to have shakened off the fear of the dark, particularly darkness in my bunk, one rumoured to have been occupied by the Japanese for horrendous activities (not to be mentioned). To spice up the rumours, supernatural sightings were passed down by sgts themselves, such as a lady in red holding a small girl's hand by her side floating above the water tank which is just 10 m away from my bed at an angle of 20 degrees. I would like to thank the makers of Shawshank Redemption for they aided me much.

" Fear can hold you prisoner, Hope can set you free. " Hope it stays this way for me, otherwise incontinence due to overendurance at night would be reality.

Training today was exceptionally long and hands were itchy, extremely. Stones were flung at a 100plus can as a test of capabilities, trying to win one other, words were arranged using stones.... stones were 'falled' in with a stone platoon IC. A coursemate found a glaring piece of dark metal sticking out of the ground then decided to unearth it, alas he failed, I failed too.

Like we normally say, it's f*ckin' deep and long. You whack it with a foot-sized rock and the rock chips, metal' still there. The main surprise of the day was the scenery of the training ground...... it'll make another good LOTR filming spot. Betcha didn't know Singapore had lovely scenic hills looking like Guilin mountains and Western pastures blended together. I couldn't really see buildings and any trace of modern architecture, it's just simply beautifully shaped hills with the right shade of green. The slight haze and cloudy weather gave it yet a better look.

Wang Kang Long, the famous, infamous, notoriously silent and 'determined' told me he realised he hasn't used his brain for a long long time. His brain cells were said to have begun loading, but today it seems like they scrambled back. He was stoning again, wouldn't even joke with me using his rap about my name. Oh well, he took his own time to dress up and wanted to get 'kept' in and was awarded an auditorial overload from the sgts. Just hope he's pretty fine like normal.